Daughter-In-law vs Mother-in-law

A married couple was in a terrible accident where the man's face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn't graft any skin from his body because he was too skinny. His wife's tissue type was a match so she offered to donate some of her own skin.

However, the only skin on her body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from her buttocks.

The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and they requested that the doctor also honor their secret. After all, this was a very delicate matter.

After the surgery was completed, everyone was astounded at the man's new face. He looked more handsome than he ever had before! All his friends and relatives just went on and on about his youthful beauty!

One day, he was alone with his wife, and he was overcome with emotion at her sacrifice. He said, "Dear, I just want to thank you for everything you did for me. How can I possibly repay you?"

"My darling," she replied, "I get all the thanks I need every time I see your mother kiss you on the cheek."

The Secret To a Happy Married Life

Once I was asked by my friend, "What is the secret behind your happy married life?"

I said-"You should share responsibilities with due love and respect each other. Then absolutely there will be no problems."

He asked-"Can you explain?"

I said-"In my house, I take decisions on bigger issues where as my wife decides on smaller issues. We do not interfere in each other's decisions."

Still not convinced, the friend asked me-"Give me some examples".

I said-"Smaller issues like,
Which car we should buy,
How much amount to save,
When to visit the super market,
When to go on vacation,
Which sofa,
Air conditioner,
Refrigerator,
Monthly expenses,
Whether to keep a maid or not etc.
Are all decided by my wife.
I just agree to it "

He asked-"Then, what is your role?"

I said-"My decisions are only for very big issues.
Like whether America should attack Iran,
Whether Britain should lift sanctions over Zimbabwe,
Whether to widen the Sri Lankan economy,
Whether Sachin tendulakar should retire from cricket etc., etc. and
Do you know, my wife, NEVER, objects to any of these decisions".

Intelligence

While visiting India, George Bush is invited to tea with Abdul Kalam. 

He asks Kalam what his leadership philosophy is. 

He says that, it is to surround himself with intelligent people. 

Bush asks how he knows if they're intelligent. 

"I do so by asking them the right questions," says Kalam. "Allow me to demonstrate." 

Why are Call Centre guys paid so much ??

1 ) Tech Support : "I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop."
Customer : "Ok."
Tech Support : "Did you get a pop-up menu?"
Customer : "No."
Tech Support : "Ok. Right click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?"
Customer : "No."
Tech Support : "Ok, sir. Can you tell me hat you have done up until
this point?"
Customer : "Sure, you told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'."

Boss Kidnapped - What to do?

Employees of a Company are all worried. Some are roaming around.Some are in loud discussions during office time.....

Some Trainees, who had just joined, notice this and enquire about what happened to a senior employee,
they ask, "What's going on?"