We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules!
1. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quest's to
see if we can find the perfect present yet again!
2. Sometimes we are not thinking about you. Live with it.
3. Don't cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive
than short hair. One of the big reasons guy's fear getting
married is that married women always cut their hair, and by
then one is stuck with her.
4. Crying is blackmail.
5. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle
hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do
not work! Just say it!
6. We don't remember dates. Mark birthday's and anniversaries on
a calendar. Remind us frequently beforehand.
7. Most guy's own three pairs of shoes - tops. What makes you
think we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty,
would look good with your dress?
8. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every
question.
9. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it.
That's what we do.Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
11. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a
Doctor.
12. Check your oil! Please.
13. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.
14. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. We
refuse to answer.
15. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of
the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
16. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want
it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it,
just do it yourself.
17. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during
commercials.
18. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do
we.
19. All men see in only 16 colors, like windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a colour. We have no idea
what 'Mauve' is.
20. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
21. We are not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of
mind-reading ability is not proof of how little we care about
you.
22. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act
like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just
not worth the hassle.
23. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an
answer you don't want to hear.
24. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is
fine. Really.
25. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are
prepared to discuss such topics as the shotgun formation, or
monster trucks.
26. You have enough clothes. You have too many shoes.
27. No you really do have too many clothes and shoes.
28. BEER is as exciting for us as handbags are for you.
29. I'm in shape. ROUND is a shape.
31. Thank you for reading this ; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on
the couch tonight, but did you know we really don't mind
that, it's like camping.
1. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quest's to
see if we can find the perfect present yet again!
2. Sometimes we are not thinking about you. Live with it.
3. Don't cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive
than short hair. One of the big reasons guy's fear getting
married is that married women always cut their hair, and by
then one is stuck with her.
4. Crying is blackmail.
5. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle
hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do
not work! Just say it!
6. We don't remember dates. Mark birthday's and anniversaries on
a calendar. Remind us frequently beforehand.
7. Most guy's own three pairs of shoes - tops. What makes you
think we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty,
would look good with your dress?
8. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every
question.
9. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it.
That's what we do.Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
11. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a
Doctor.
12. Check your oil! Please.
13. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.
14. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us. We
refuse to answer.
15. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of
the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
16. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want
it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it,
just do it yourself.
17. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during
commercials.
18. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do
we.
19. All men see in only 16 colors, like windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a colour. We have no idea
what 'Mauve' is.
20. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
21. We are not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of
mind-reading ability is not proof of how little we care about
you.
22. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act
like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just
not worth the hassle.
23. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an
answer you don't want to hear.
24. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is
fine. Really.
25. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are
prepared to discuss such topics as the shotgun formation, or
monster trucks.
26. You have enough clothes. You have too many shoes.
27. No you really do have too many clothes and shoes.
28. BEER is as exciting for us as handbags are for you.
29. I'm in shape. ROUND is a shape.
31. Thank you for reading this ; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on
the couch tonight, but did you know we really don't mind
that, it's like camping.
No comments:
Post a Comment