Little Johnny Strikes - 1

In a classroom of third graders, the teacher says to the kids, "Today class, we will be telling stories that have a moral to them." 

She explained what a moral to a story was and asked for volunteers.  Little Suzie raises her hand.

Suzie: " I live on a farm and we have a chicken that laid 12 eggs, we were excited to have 12 more chickens but only 6 of them hatched."
Teacher: "That's a good story, now what is the moral?"
Suzie: " Don't count your chickens before they are hatched."
Teacher: "Very good Suzie, anyone else?"

Ralphie: "Yes teacher, I was carrying some eggs I bought for my mom in my bicycle basket one day and I  
               crashed my bike and all the eggs broke."
Teacher: "That's a nice story, what is the moral?"
Ralphie: "Don't put all your eggs in one basket."
Teacher: "Very good Ralphie, anyone else?" 

Little Johnny: "Yes teacher, my Aunt Karen is in the army and when she was in the Gulf War, she parachuted 
                      down with only a gun, 20 bullets, a knife, and a six-pack of beer. On her way down, she drank the 
                      six pack. When she landed, she shot 20 Iraqis and killed ten of them with her knife." 
Teacher: "Very interesting, Johnny, what is the moral to your story?"
Little Johnny: "Don't F**k with Aunt Karen when she's drunk."