Friday, August 17, 2012

Bollywood call center


Amithabh: Thank you for calling customer care? rishte mein to hum tumhare baap lagate hian filhaal ek customer care rep hain?
Customer : (angrily) I NEED YOUR MANAGER 
Amithabh: Jaao pehle uske manager ko laao jisne mere baap ko chor kaha tha.. Jaao pehle uske manager ko laao jisne meri maa ko gaali dekar naukri se nikaal diya tha.. Jaao pehle uske manager ko laao jisne mere haath pe yeh likh diya tha? uske baad uske baad mere bhai.. Tum jis manager ko kahoge main laaonga..

Dharmendra: Thank you for callllllliiiiingggg?.. 
Customer:     
I need help 
Dharmendra: 
main aaraahoon maa? 
Customer:     
I am unable use your product? its waste and worthless 
Dharmendra: 
Kutte mein tera khoon peejaaonga.. 
Customer:     
What!!! I need your manager 
Dharmendra: 
(To his manager) Manager is customer ke saamne nahi naachna

Shatru : Aaaaaiiin Kis ullllu ke patthe ne call kiya hai... 
Customer 
: How dare you speak like that 
Shatru : 
Khaaaamoshhhhh? seedhi tarah bolde issue kya hai warna? haaaaaaaaa!!!

Asrani: hahhaaaaaaa  naya kabutar ne call kiya 
Customer: 
I lost my invoice 
Asrani : 
Hahhaaaaaaaa hamare jasoos kone kone mein phaile hue hain miljayegi hum angrezon ke zamaane ke rep hain..haahhaaa

Kestu Mukherji:   Iiiiiihhhhye?. 
Customer: 
hi 
Kestu Mukherji : 
iiiihhhyeee tumko ?.tumko kya problem hai 
Customer : 
I have not received my product 
Kestu Mukherji : 
To saale (hicup) main kya karoon.. Police mien report likha?

Bindu:   Shabnam naam hai mera? pyar se log shabbo bolte hain..bolo main tumhare kis kaam aasakti hoon.

Shakti: AAAuuuuuu?mera naam hai balllllllllma. Thank you for calling aaauuuuu 
Customer: 
I need your manager 
Shakti: 
Mujhse baat karona.. Main ek chhota sa, nanha sa, pyarasa?rep hooon..

Mehmood: Ayyo Dyevi ? thank youji for calling ji.. Ayyo 
Customer : 
I am not devi 
Mehmood : 
Ayyo muruga? ye dyevi nai ji ? ye to dyeva hai?

Ajit: Saara shehar mujhe Lion ke naam se jaanta hai?.. May I know your name please
Customer : Mona 
Ajit 
: Mona darling? tumne hamein call kyun kiya 
Customer 
: (Angrily) I WANT YOUR MANAGER 
Ajit: 
Mona dear.. Agar hum tumhe hamara manager dedenge to hamein manage kaun karega?.

Gabbar : HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA ?.Jo dargaya wo maraga? batao tumhen kya chahiye 
Customer : 
I want to buy a product from your company 
Gabbar: 
Kitne paise hai re 
Customer 
: $ 10.00 
Gabbar: 
Suvvar Ke baccho ? sirf? $10.00?dhikkaar hai

Prem Chopra: Prem?Prem naam hai mera.. Prem chopra? 
Customer : 
I lost my invoice I need one 
Prem Chopra: 
Kar bhalaa to ho bhalaa..jaa apni invoice khud dhoondle

Rajkumar : Jaani ?.. Tumhara ye call bahut keemti hai.. Ise cut mat karna 
Customer: 
  I lost my invoice 
Rajkumar: 
  Jaani? ye invoice hai.. Bacchon ke khelne ki cheez nahi 
Customer : 
shut up.. I need my invoice sent to me in 10 minutes? otherwise I will speak to your manager 
Rajkumar : 
Dhamki kisi aur ko jaakar dena?      manager humko darasake manager mein itna dum nahi? humse hai manager? manager se hum nahi...

Sharukh: Thank you for kkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk
Customer hung up the phone?

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